I Like The Way You Burke It

I can understand the Spanish better than the English. When I say English I mean British, not English speaking.

Today I had lunch at the Coach and Horses and I don’t know why because the whole planet thinks English food is the pits. There was a large party that took up almost the whole restaurant so I sat at the bar. The food took an extraordinary long time to come out, presumably because of the large party. My pork chop came out and I was starting to eat it when the waitress came back and placed something else for me to eat on the side.

Waitress: Complements of the Chef.

Kate: Thank you. What is it?

Waitress: A side of Herpes.

Kate: What?

Waitress: Her-pes. (then she looked at me like I was the village idiot)

I know that there is more than one way to catch Herpes but having it served to you in a ramekin at your lunch is not something with which I am familiar. I raised my eyebrow a bit and gave a little smile and a nod thinking that I would just slide the Herpes around to make it look like I ate some. But no! She waited! She waited for me to taste the Herpes-British-Simplex-2 and give her a reaction. I could not find it in me to be rude so I tasted it. And it was stuffing. Like Stove Top Stuffing. Filled with Spices. And here is the AH-HA moment. Herbs. Herbs and Spices.

Herb-ies. Not Herpes. WHEW!